Hard Fought Defeat Leftovers
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So these leftovers come with a bit of an asterisk.
My original version of Hard Fought Defeat isn’t the one that appears on the main site. When initially finishing the group of lyrics, there were 14 things that made the cut. It wasn’t until prepping them for this website that I realized it was too much and hurt the overall quality as a result.
So if you think that two of these leftovers stick out from the rest, it’s because they do. Made Of Glass and Amputees were both in the middle of the original version of Hard Fought Defeat. Taking them out helped the group a lot, even though I think they’re both good (I’m especially partial to Made Of Glass actually.)
When it comes to the rest, these leftovers show that the main group of lyrics could’ve been a lot darker. I was working through some heavy emotions after my dad passed away and didn’t know how to express them at first. It resulted in some experimentation, leading to Something Different and In My Dreams specifically. I think they’re both really good in a unique way but just didn’t fit the direction everything else ended up taking.
Pavement is a bit dark too but was actually carried over from Bloodhounds. It’s something I attempted to use on For Those Left Behind and Nocturnal but just never came together. In the end, a chunk of it was lifted and transplanted into Followers, which appears on the latter. Embrace The Light was written during these sessions and attempted again for the next group of lyrics but didn’t feel strong enough to include on either.
Looking back, I don’t regret leaving these behind. Either they didn’t fit or just weren’t strong enough for inclusion.
Lyrics Content
01. Pavement
02. Made Of Glass
05. In My Dreams
06. Amputees
Pavement
Been cracking my skull on the pavement
I still don’t know how to behave but maybe
Everybody always needs saving
Asking all the questions, have you seen me lately?
Have you seen me lately?
Wasted every breath on the answer
Spreading like a cancer that thrives on impact
Chilled down to the bones in my body
It’s getting so hot that I can’t see the abstract
I can’t see the abstract
Now I’m calling to the great beyond
Staying up past midnight ’til the morning dawns
Holding onto nothing but I can’t go wrong
I can’t go wrong, I can’t go wrong
Burned all the witches in the attic
It sounds so dramatic but I’ve gone brainsick
Everyone’s trying to digest this
Prophetic as it seems, have you seen the pavement?
Have you seen the pavement?
Now I’m calling to the great beyond
Staying up past midnight ’til the morning dawns
Holding onto nothing but I can’t go wrong
I can’t go wrong, I can’t go wrong
Now they’re watching from the great unknown
Gonna come down on me if they don’t like what they’re shown
Trapped in my seclusion but I can’t let go
I can’t let go, oh no
Faced every demon in the closet
Thought I bought the farm but it’s all so measured
Every last vacant conversation
Heading to the pavement but it’s been my pleasure
Well it’s been my pleasure
Made Of Glass
I’m not sure what you’ve been told
But now you stare and won’t approach
Why deny what I’ve been through?
When I don’t owe a thing to you
Everybody runs when they see me coming down the aisle
Afraid that there’s a waterfall hiding right behind this smile
Am I made of glass, can you see straight through me?
Will I fall to pieces if you say my name?
I’m tired of watching people as they walk on eggshells
Convinced I’m damaged goods when I’m still the same
Well I don’t need someone to blame
By now I’ve realized that silence works both ways
I don’t know what you have heard
But now it seems you’re lost for words
Fake concern and then explain
Why these thoughts sound so profane
Everybody turns when they hear me walking down the hall
No one wants to deal with the grief that much at all
Am I made of glass, can you see straight through me?
Will I fall to pieces if you say my name?
I’m tired of watching people as they walk on eggshells
Convinced they share my story when it’s not the same
I still don’t need someone to blame
By now I’ve realized this silence works both ways
Take off these kid gloves, I don’t need your sympathy
I know you’re not sure what to say
If you walked a country mile inside my shoes
You’d understand and then acknowledge why
It’s useless to complain
Am I made of glass, can you see straight through me?
Will I fall to pieces if you say my name?
I’m tired of all these people as they walk on eggshells
Convinced they share my story when it’s not the same
I still don’t need someone to blame
By now I know that it’s too late
Something Different
Sleep until the sun sets, stay up in the darkness
Count down every second falling off the clock face
Still there’s no escape, there’s never an escape
Now I can’t see a thing and I don’t want to… anyway
Can’t find motivation, some might call me faithless
Stranger ’til your weightless, chasing down some white noise
Still it’s not a choice, it never was a choice
Now I can’t feel a thing but I will always… be destroyed
I’ve had so many dreams where this death was a mistake
All to wake and find our time already spent
There used to be a day I would put up such resistance
While now I wish that this was something different
Now I wish that this was something different
Now I wish that this was something different
Embrace The Light
While drifting out in shadows
Watching life just pass you by
Since the day your heart was broken
You’ve refused to go outside
I don’t have all the answers
But I think that you should know
You can’t sleep away your sadness
And expect it to let go
It’s sink or swim, so get up and fight
Look past this poison rain tonight
One for all, we all recite
Now come back down, embrace the light
You’re living life in anger
Where no consequence resides
Coming down from all resistance
In the answers you’ve denied
Since no one else escapes it
In the end we’re not immune
You can’t change the deal you’re handed
Killing time in a cocoon
It’s sink or swim, so get up and fight
Look past this poison rain tonight
One for all, we all recite
Now come back down, embrace the light
Come back down, embrace the light
Both my wings burn in the sun
Something like Icarus, nothing but a hypocrite
While this life can’t be undone
Especially when we’re living it, never when we’re finished it
Never when we’re finished it
Never when we’re finished it
It’s time to get rid of this now
It’s sink or swim, so get up and fight
Look past this poison rain tonight
One for all, we all recite
Now come back down, embrace the light
Come back down, embrace the light
Come back down, embrace the light
Come back down, we’ll all burn bright
In My Dreams
Real world coming down
Trapped inside my head
I’m trapped inside a nightmare
Made to tell you that you’re dead
I wish I could stay sleeping
To touch you once again
Pretend that it’s reality
As reality sets in
How do we define what we’ve become?
I don’t want to wake up, I don’t want to wake up
Heaven coming down
Stuck on my two feet
I’m stuck inside myself again
As this kingdom come repeats
It’s harder to stay sleeping
So now I’m wide awake
Pretending we’re invincible
It’s a lie that I’ll re-trace
How can we rely on what’s to come?
I wish that you would wake up, I wish that you would wake up
Screaming out from both my burning lungs
It’s only in my dreams, it’s only in my dreams after all
It’s only in my dreams, it’s only in my dreams after all
It’s only in my dreams, it’s only in my dreams
Amputees
The right hand’s been cut off
The writing’s on the wall but I can’t read it
No I can’t see it anymore
We’ve stormed the castle halls
Not ready for the fall, now we’re depleted
We’ll lie defeated on the floor
While heaven sent our sacraments, I’ll let these two dice roll
We can’t begin from where we’ve been until the last bell tolls
All amputees
We’ll come again, you’ll see
On bended knees, we’ll all profess
The right hand lands on green
The writing’s so pristine that I feel envy
Now I feel envy for these words
It’s strange to walk the streets
Restrained in our defeat, we’re such a lost cause
We’ll never follow the absurd
While heaven bound straight from the ground, , I guess I’ll let it ride
We can’t exist and then dismiss the ones we’ll leave behind
All amputees
We’ll come again, you’ll see
On bended knees, we’ll all profess
Confessions moving past
As each prophecy’s fulfilled
Self-involvement only dictates
When the patient get too ill
Longing for connection
But the nerves have been decayed
Now we’re digging for some diamonds
On our last remaining days
What can I say?
What can I say?
All amputees
We’ll come again, you’ll see
On bended knees, we’ll all profess
We’ll all profess
All amputees
Will one day be complete
On bended knees, we’ll all profess
We’ll all profess