I’m at a bit of a crossroads with the seasonal release thing.
On one hand, I’m really proud of what’s been finished so far. Autumn is kind of insane and the two pieces I’ve finished for winter are my most personal about going blind. As I mentioned, this whole thing would cover that year in my life, essentially from March 2001 until March 2002. I’ve never really covered the latter two seasons in much detail before, so it’s given me a lot to write about.
The thing that bothers me though is how I’ll be a 40-year-old writing about stuff that happened to me when I was 18/19. While it’s not a big deal for autumn and winter, spring and summer would be set around high school, which is… weird. I fell for someone hard at the time and that makes for good material, but let’s be serious… I’m happily married and have been for almost a decade now (I’ve actually been with my wife for over 17 years.) You never forget your first love, but it’s really hard for me to write about it and not feel silly now.
Those feelings play heavily into dealing with blindness though, so I kind of have to cover how it started in spring and summer. With that being the case, it’s a real fine line between writing an authentic set of lyrics vs something that feels out of place for where I’m at now. In the end, I still have to relate with what I’m currently writing. That’s no small feat in this case.
In some instances, it’s been one step forward and two steps back. I just cut something from summer because it felt too dated. Trying to find the right tone for spring has been fairly difficult too: Despite having three things finished, I’m currently stumped over where it should go next.
Still, there’s a lot that’s so good and if I can pull this thing off, it will be amazing.