Sleepwalking

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Can you sense the teenage angst radiating off your computer screen?

 

If so, it’s probably because this is the first group of lyrics I ever wrote and published on a website. These versions have been revised over the years but were originally written back in 2001. For those keeping score, I was only 18 and in my last year of high school at the time.

 

While some of it is cringe-inducing and melodramatic, a lot still holds up surprisingly well. I’m partial to Someone To Blame, Inside The Turbulence, Ground Zero, Sleepwalking, Safety Net and Free To Lose.

 

Overall, I definitely don’t hate this grouping. With hindsight though, I can tell which influences/songs I blatantly ripped off for some of these. It’s obvious to me when I was writing something I thought sounded cool vs. something that actually had meaning too. On top of that, a lot of these are focused on one person in particular and that makes my adult-self a little uneasy. (I guess that socially awkward teenage Marc was a bit creepier than what I’d remembered.)

 

For those interested, the original version of these lyrics can also be found in the Fireteddy National Library.

 

Lyrics Content

 

01. Trip To Fall

02. Someone To Blame

03. Inside The Turbulence

04. December #21

05. Ground Zero

06. Sleepwalking

07. Safety Net

08. Far Away

09. Blowout

10. Unresolved

11. Free To Lose

12. Diamond

13. Sunrise

 

Trip To Fall

 

This breeze in the air

Like stars in the night

Blown out with a flare

after shining most bright

Everything’s changing

Maybe in awhile

These notions of living

They’ll still make me smile

They can make us smile

 

So will you think of me?

Do I think of it at all?

I remember funny situations

With you running down the hall

 

Do you still trip to fall?

Do you still trip to fall?

 

It starts out so easy

Like stars in the sky

This speed of the light

to watch time ticking by

Now everyone’s moving

Everybody moves

While sometimes we win

There’s nothing left to lose

Nothing left to lose

 

So will you think of me?

Do I think of it at all?

I remember funny situations

With you running down the hall

 

Do you still trip to fall?

Do you still trip to fall?

 

It starts out so innocent

but eventually we crawl

My feelings are distant

Does it matter at all?

It starts out so easy

Like stars in the sky

This speed of the light

to watch time ticking by

But this was never mine

This was never mine

 

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Someone To Blame

 

I’m living in the trash talk

Where everything is hollow

The hallways made of garbage

And everyone just follows

We all deserve a change now

It’s time to see the light

Still looking for the antidote

But I’m blinded by the sight

 

I can’t remember anything

Nothing here’s the same

It’s crazy how they worship me

They don’t even know my name

They just need someone to blame

They just need someone to blame

 

I’m living in the feedback

I’m dying in the aftermath

The runways made of bodies

And everybody’s blood baths

I think I need a change now

I think we need the rain

I’m looking for the antidote

But it’s carving out my brain

 

I can’t remember anything

Nothing here’s the same

It’s crazy how they worship me

They don’t even know my name

They just need someone to blame

They just need someone to blame

 

These sheltered lives we lead

The blind leading the blind

I’d tell you what we need

But it’s just too hard to find

 

It’s out of sight and out of mind

It’s out of sight and out of mind

 

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Inside The Turbulence

 

Oceans ripple, no silver lining

Waves are rising and boats capsizing

Your mind keeps losing and now you’re falling

Inside the turbulence you feel it calling

 

When nothing’s simple and nothing sane

Break it all and feel no pain

What you are and what you’ll be

It’s all destruction, wait and see

 

Wait another day

Never fade away

Another thing to say

Never fade away

Never fade away

 

The curtains fall and parts are cast

As light shines off this broken glass

Smashed up mirrors with broken nights

A damaged mind from every fight

 

All or nothing, there’s nothing wrong

They’ve always hoped you’d play along

Faith in destruction and earth to destroy

Living combustible, you’re getting annoyed

 

Wait another day

Never fade away

Another thing to say

Never fade away

Never fade away

 

Be careful what you wish for

One day it might come true

The future isn’t working out

But it’s always up to you

 

Be careful what you wish for

One day it might arrive

All the times you’ve felt ignored

Is there time to feel alive?

As you struggle to survive

 

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December #21

 

Where is everybody?

It’s too cold to be outside

You try to be someone

Who can let the fear subside

 

Why does everybody die?

Why does everybody die?

 

Why do we ask questions?

For answers still unknown

Why do these things happen?

Why do we grow old?

 

Why does everybody die?

Why does everybody die?

 

You think you have it all

Like it’s under your control

Just so you can realize

Your destiny is sold

 

But baby that’s okay

Well baby that’s okay

You know baby that’s okay

Because we still have today

 

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Ground Zero

 

Mission accomplished

Job well done

No place to hide

And nowhere to run

These stars shoot across

As you lie on the ground

There’s so much you’ve lost

But what have you found?

 

These tears that you’ve cried

Have all been in vain

If you start at ground zero

You won’t have to complain

 

Close your eyes and turn the page

Close your eyes and turn the page

 

Look at your life now

The model of sane

To drift in the night how?

It resets your brain

You look at the ceiling

With paralyzed thoughts

It’s something you’re feeling

But something’ you’re not

 

The tears that you’ve cried

Have all been in vain

If you start at ground zero

You won’t have to complain

 

Close your eyes and turn the page

Close your eyes and turn the page

 

You’ll set with the sun

This chapter is done

 

How fast can you run?

This chapter is done

This chapter is done

This chapter is done

 

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Sleepwalking

 

With nothing to say

You stand and you stare

You’re coming to realize

That nobody’s there

 

With each morning hour

That burns in the sun

You’re starting to realize

You’re in need of someone

 

Those days moved so slowly

you were just killing time

But everything’s fine

Everything’s fine

 

Stop all this talking

It’s only sleepwalking

These chances we take

The hearts that we break

 

Stop all this talking

It’s only sleepwalking

These chances we take

There’s no time to waste

 

These chances we take

Now it’s time that you wake

 

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Safety Net

 

It seems we’ve been busy

So busy with hunting

Maybe for something

But mostly for nothing

Life is a tumour

Now stick it all out

Mind in the gutter

Obsessed with each doubt

 

Our mighty have fallen

Now the weak are all gone

In the middle there’s pain

But it’s all with the blond

 

We’ve all been so busy

With hunting the beasties

We’re still busy looking

It’s dumb but it’s easy

Life is a cancer

So waste it away

A mind in the blender

That’s starting to stray

 

Our mighty have fallen

Now the weak are all gone

In the middle there’s pain

But it’s all with the blond

 

Their guns have been drawn

Their guns have been drawn

 

I’m tired of looking

I’m tired of this fate

I’m tired of everything

My mind in this state

 

With instances lying

The truth becomes boring

So you’re left justifying

What the rest are ignoring

 

Our mighty have fallen

Now the weak are all gone

In the middle there’s pain

But it’s all with the blond

 

Their guns have been drawn

Their guns have been drawn

 

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Far Away

 

So far away

I’m standing still

But still

You’re no closer than before

 

I feel so close

You don’t know where to start

I feel no distance

But still we’re miles apart

 

Where did you go wrong?

Where did you go wrong?

 

So far away

I can feel a chill

But still

You’re no better than before

 

I feel so close

Both under the moon

Have you escaped?

Were you leaving soon?

 

Where did we go wrong?

Where did we go wrong?

 

Where did this go wrong?

Where did this go wrong?

 

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Blowout

 

Looking back to find the story

But I can’t remember much

Fading back to former glory

Can’t think inside the clutch

Maybe I’ll remember soon

Maybe I will just forget

It seems foundation’s come to ruin

Corrupted by regret

 

Where does it go from here? I don’t know

Sell your soul, give in to fear and then you go

For in the very last second you become something more

Something to adore

Something to adore

 

Maybe truth will give me answers

Strange I can’t remember still

I hope you’re waiting for the ride

Still waiting for the thrill

Maybe I’ll remember soon

Maybe I will just explode

The nights you lose beneath the moon

Another winding road

 

Where does it go from here? I don’t know

Sell your soul, give in to fear and then you go

For in the very last second you become something more

Something to adore

Something to adore

 

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Unresolved

 

I go out with other people

And I wonder where you are

I’ve tried to get away from this

But it never gets me far

 

I guess that in that month or two

I offered you too much

Now you’re gone, what else is new?

Out of service, out of touch

 

So we’ve got something left

There’s always something left

 

Nothing left to feel here now

Still I wonder where you are

This bitterness takes shape somehow

As you become a dying star

 

Maybe in a month or two

In the morning I’ll be fine

But all my love belonged to you

After 1999

 

So we’ve got something left

There’s always something left

So we’ve got something left

 

Something unresolved

Something unresolved

Something unresolved

Something…

 

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Free To Lose

 

Cough up the blood I spilt for you

The sacrifice is nothing new

Maybe we can get away

And lose it just for once

The years you say are caving in

You don’t agree with where you’ve been

And everyone is panickin’

They’ve lost it all at once

They’ve lost it all at once

 

Are you free to do something tonight?

Maybe we can get out to the light

And try to make it one more time

Are you free to lose tonight?

Are you free to lose tonight?

 

Cough up the cancer in your bones

The sacrifice is all I know

Maybe we can sail away

And drift into the night

Your life you feel it rushing in

Nothing’s wrong, you haven’t been

All along you were lying and

You lost it all at once

You lost it all at once

 

Are you free to do something tonight?

Maybe we can get out to the light

And try to make it one more time

Are you free to lose tonight?

Are you free to lose tonight?

 

The night you got all messed up

Well it messed me up for years

I hope that you remember how

I soaked up all your tears

 

I guess that’s just the way it goes

We just let on like no one knows

Hold your breath and count to ten

Well here we go again

Here we go again

 

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Diamond

 

A diamond in the rough

A face left in the crowd

Some chances coming up

This secret seems too loud

 

We used to be invincible

Like shadows in the night

Though I can feel it slip away

This love has reached it’s heights

 

It’s everything you want to see

And everything you wanted too

Something I refuse to be

But all I want is you

Yeah all I want is you

 

Are you fading in the distance?

Me, I’m setting with the sun

I’ll take the path of least resistance

So I can fool you when I’m done

 

It’s everything you want to see

And everything you wanted too

Something I refuse to be

But all I want is you

Yeah all I want is you

 

A diamond in the rough

A face left in the crowd

Our future’s turning up

But the past won’t make a sound

 

It won’t say a thing…

It won’t say a thing…

 

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Sunrise

 

Sitting in this tiny capsule

I hope you’re keeping score

Miles and miles beneath the ground

Lonely like before

 

Cautious are the doubters

While spontaneous, the dumb

Looking for a new way out

Someday it will come

 

But today I just feel numb

Today I just feel numb

 

Rising with the phoenix glow

Please admit defeat

Along with all the things you know

I’ll make my last retreat

 

This sunrise will repeat

This sunrise will repeat

 

The then and now will meet

And this sunrise will repeat

This sunrise will repeat

 

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